Mothers normally fuss over their daughters and do their best to help and inspire them. Mothers also have all kinds of different personalities when it comes to organising a wedding. Some love to make lists and get involved in each and every part of the preparations, while others panic about being in the limelight on the big day.
Your mother’s involvement in your wedding will depend greatly on your relationship with her, as well as the age at which you are getting married. To much pressure from you to involve her if she is reluctant might lead her to feel uneasy amongst your guests, or allowing her to become too excited about everything may end up ina disaster if things get out of hand.
Here are few ideas about mother of the bride duties so that she can not only help you arrange the event but also enjoys it on the day.
Make sure your mother performs tasks that she finds easy to do. Plan things in a way that distracts her from interfering in other arrangements that you would rather look after yourself. If you are sensitive about your flowers or wedding cake design, for example, make sure you handle them yourself rather than letting your mother do it, as it will just cause confusion and unnecessary discussion otherwise.
Mothers normally feel that they should have a say in who should be invited. Ask both families to make a guest list of the people they would like to invite and then discuss it with your mother. Make the final list under her supervision. Start with guests who have to be be invited and compromise on the others.
Your nmother’s advice will be of great value to you. Chat with her about everything aspect of your wedding to find out her opinions. Ask for her advice and help when planning the event and keep updating her about how the preparations are progressing to keep her feeling involved and happy.
Parents often have a more expert opinion than thier offspring about budget allocation. If your family is paying for the event, then obviously their suggestions and involvement matter the most. Document all the financial details and share them with your mother.
Traditionally, parents bear the expenses for all or part of their children’s weddings. If this is the case in your family, then let your parents know about every bit of money you spend. Make a budget early on and let them know if you are purchasing expensive items or are threatening to go over budget in any area.
While your mother will normally like to choose her outfit by herself, help make things easy for her by sharing your colour themes and ideas with her and going shopping with her over a weekend. Spend a whole day helping her choose the right outfit and accessories to make her feel special on the big day.
Your mother wish to wear a totally different dress or design from the mother of the groom and bridesmaids, so make sure you provide her with all the information she needs about what everyone else will be wearing.
Say thank you
After your mother has performed her duties; make sure to present her with a unique gift, either at rehearsal dinner or during the wedding breakfast speeches. Flowers or a piece of jewellery would be appropriate choices.
Even if your mother does not play a large part in the wedding arrangements; still say a public thank you to her for all her contributions in your life to date.